Jennapher-dot-com

  Where did this daily - almost - mantra originate? I don't really remember, but I know it has something to do with the monotony that I have felt since my head exploded and the life I knew went up in flames. I was trying to rebuild something that resembled that other life, and that wasn't happening. I wish I could say why, exactly, but I honestly don't know.      Still, even as I studied Buddhist philosophy and embarked on meditative practice I kept it up - every day being to me, with the short term memory issues, so similar to the last that they WERE truly almost indistinguishable. This is still the case these 15 years later. My life is -- empty, in my opinion, devoid of purpose and meaning. I feel that I just wake up every day, against my will, and take care of this body, that I really consider to be a prison, and then go back to bed. I consider these to be joyless chores. I honestly do. I just trudge along through it until I can finally go back to bed. Then I do i...

There are days when I decide to DO something, and it does appear that EVERYONE and EVERYTHING around me conspires to block me from it. Today it was wireless keyboard problems and then wireless mouse problems. Then I just went to do another project. The aforementioned peripherals are working fine now, but I cannot even begin to tell you how or why, and I suspect it was the universe testing my resolve. I am unperturbed. I am here, DOING this anyway. Chalk up a point for me.      I know I'm not the only one who experiences this, and there are tons of people online being coaches and inspirational figures who offer untold mounts of advice regarding how to overcome these days. I'm not going to do that. I'm just going to write this post and see if I can figure out how I want to format it.     This entry will just remain here as my first post ever, forever.      What is my blog going to be about? It's going to be about me, and well anyone else I decide to...